--Man, Paula was on point during the performance show.  I guess she waited until AFTER the show to get loaded, suck down a vial of vicodin and bone the contestants.   She actually made good points, and completed her sentences.  See, it's easier to judge them when you admit that they sucked, isn't it Paula?

--Was that the most Fast-Forwarable Results show?  Big surprise, David Vs. David.  I could’ve skipped the ENTIRE SEASON from Final 12 on.

--Is the title of Fantasia’s new song, “Bore Me” a critique on this season?   Because that’s how I feel.  The theme for Season 7 was Boring with a capital “BORING.”  

Finally the gloriously bad Idol episode that we’ve all been waiting for. All sorts of musical attrocities were committed, including a song sung by penguins and a love song about a giant meteor. Yes!!! I loved it.

Everyone got in the spirit tonight. Simon was on-point all night, including picking the ONLY decent song of the evening for David Cook. Paula was actually sober and coherent, making strong points about the singing and performances, as if her job depended on her, you know, judging the damn show. Seacrest making his unfunny non-jokes and Randy spending the whole evening trying to stroke his own ego. That was some episode. Oh, and Lloyd from “Entourage” was in attendance. Good stuff.

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Seacrest ponderously announces that the Idols will be singing two songs from the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame list of all-time great rock songs.  “Maybe one of them will end up in the Hall some day” muses Ryan.  Eh, maybe not, dude.

After a lively discussion of what is wrong with Idol here at VFTW, I think we can all agree on one point.  What if they took away all the lies and the money-grubbing and humiliation of delusional contestants, and just made the show into a singing competition?

What is so wrong about a nation-wide search for the best undiscovered talent in America?  Oh, right.  Because this..............................................................
Is American Idol...  How could I forget?

Random Idol Thoughts

Paula-Gate 2008 is growing in intensity… well it is for us at VFTW, I think the typical  teeny-booper  (misspelling was unintentional, but funnier)  Idol fans still don’t give a rip that their show is broken this season.

Paula’s AI apologists have come out of the wood-work.  “Oh, it’s just Paula, she made a mistake.  It’s live TV.”  Heck, I even made a bone-headed typo writing about it.  

“Relentless Musical Force” Neil Diamond (to quote Seacrest) is our mentor this week, a week that had strong potential for VFTW bad-goodness. The producers started the ball rolling by presenting Diamond’s starring role in the horrible, misguided remake of “The Jazz Singer”, as a success! That’s like saying “Carly Smithson’s album was beloved by hundreds.”

The Idols had to learn and perform TWO songs each this week. Add in Neil’s cornball lyrics, bullfrog croak of a voice and penchant for shiny shirts... Musical crimes were going to be committed tonight. I mean, this is the guy who seriously wrote a song about E.T. ,”Turn on Your Heart-light.” How could this NOT be a VFTW suck-stravaganza?

Random Idol Thoughts.

-- Two days later and it is STILL funny.  I was convinced that Syesha was going home.  I stood up and cheered when The Plant bit the dust.  That was awesome. 

-- Every time a favorite goes home early and someone stays after a terrible performance, it just validates everything we stand for at VFTW.  If this show was really about giving the best performance week after week then Brooke or Jason goes home, no questions.  Plantson gave one of her best performances Tuesday, so naturally she goes home. 

We start our re-cap with bad news for Idol, that Jordin Sparks has vocal chord problems. This is sad because she was set to go on the Alicia Keys tour, which could’ve launched her singing career into a different stratosphere. Now, she has to sit on the sidelines because of the endless American Idol press and singing tour she was forced to endure, because she's only 17 and she didn’t learn how to take care of her voice properly. We hope that Jordin recovers. Of course nobody on Idol wishes Jordan well DURING THE SHOW. They better say something tomorrow.

Going in, Mariah Carey week promised VFTW-Championship level bad performances. We’re talking all time crapitude. There was no way the shrieking diva, who has her own personal fight with painkillers and sanity and good taste could make a boring episode.  This was going to be an all-time bad show of Idol. How could it be anything less than astounding? Oh, right, THESE are our Idols.