David Hernandez
David Hernandez Thinks He Was Voted Out Because He's Gay
Michael Musto of the Village Voice ran into season 7 loser David Hernandez at a gay bar. When asked if he thought he was voted out when Vote for the Worst brought to light his past as a gay stripper named Caden, he said, "It wasn't the stripper thing. It was the gay thing. That's Middle America for you." First of all, he kept lying and saying he was straight all season. That's why no one backed him like they're backing Adam. He's a shameful closet case. Caden also says he's friends with Adam Lambert, and when told that Adam hasn't been voted off, he replied, "Not yet." Looks like someone is jealous!
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A Presidential Lapse of Judgment - Caden to Perform at Inauguration Kick Off
For some reason, David Hernandez was asked to sing at President Obama's Inauguration Kick Off Celebration with 4 other singers on a song called "Born Again American." Obama likes lap dances? Apparently this travesty will also be released as a video on iTunes. Caden had this to say:
"A few months ago I was asked by Norman Lear and Declare Yourself (www. declareyourself. com) to be a part of an incredible song titled "Born Again American". We recorded the vocals and my portion of the video in 1 hour right in front of the Red Rock Mountains in Colorado. The video includes many other talented and unknown musicians from across the United States and sends a strong message about what it is to be an American."
Well, at least he knows he's unknown, but he still thinks he's talented? A quick look at Hernandezfans.com (his official website) and the 46 total members registered (really? that's sad) would prove otherwise.
Gay Stripper Doesn't Like Vote for the Worst
Caden has responded to our mocking of his song "Yo Name" in a MySpace bulletin. He says:
So.........
Of course we all know, that there are HATERS, in this world....people that will do anything to defame you.... (ie, votefortheworst, and other hilariously pathetic sites)
But I just wanted to clarify to my fans, that YO NAME is not a new song....and neither are the pictures...in fact they are close to 4 YEARS OLD!!! LOL.....As you can guess, my voice and writing style has improved since then... Now, while I am still proud of the music, this is not my first single and will not be on my first record..... The song was released by my previous record label.....
Thanks to Rickey. org for promoting the single and for being a fan of it......you've always been great. As for the other sites, keep talking about me....it keeps me motivated to prove you wrong:)
Oops! We feel so bad that we assumed a song that says "2008 Genre Records" on your site is actually new. And we certainly will keep talking about you, because you make us laugh. I mean, how many gay strippers routinely pretend to be straight and think they have a shot at a record deal, yet have little to no chance of succeeding? Well... a lot. But you're our least favorite! We don't need to do anything to defame you, we merely post your songs and pictures and laugh. They're that funny.
Gay Stripper Releases a New Song
For some reason, David Hernandez is still pretending to be straight. To help further this ridiculous facade, the gay stripper has released a new song called "Yo Name" on his Myspace. The song is awful, complete with amateur photography of him riding in a car with a tranny. Look, we're going to be blunt here, David. 1) No one likes you. Not even us. 2) Stop pretending to be straight. Not even your mom believes it. 3) You suck at singing and have no star potential. Go back to offering to give middle-aged men blow jobs for money. It might be the only thing you have a talent for.
David Hernandez is So Desperate for Attention That...
He lets Extra film him while he gets a microderm abrasion. So sad. The unintentionally funny moments of the video are when he pretends to be straight and the announcer refers to him as not liking girly things, he refers to himself as "performing" but doesn't specify stripping or singing (it's stripping), and when he desperately pimps his MySpace at the end as if people will care to listen to him sing.
And Even Less Loved...
OK, so we overexaggerated on the last story. Constantine has work... in Desperation Tour 2008! Actually, it's just 4 American Idol finalists singing Christmas songs on December 3rd at the State Theatre in Easton, PA. The desperate out-of-work Idols who will be performing there are Constantine (ugh!), Kimberly Caldwell (double ugh!), David Hernandez (who?), and Diana Degarmo. Seriously, Diana. We don't even care that much about you but you can definitely do better than this group of desperate wannabes. Drop out and let someone truly pathetic take your place... like Carly Smithson. Thanks to MJ's Big Blog for the tip!
David Hernandez Pretends To Be Straight
Nice try, Caden. Perez Hilton has pictures up of David Hernandez making out with a desperate female who doesn't know he's gay. And behind him is probably his current trick saying, "Are we done with this fake stuff yet so we can go back to the hotel room and bone?" Poor, Caden. So desperate for attention. David who?
David Hernandez is Not Ashamed of His Past... at the Pizza Bistro
PageSix has a post-boot interview with David Hernandez where he says he's not ashamed of his stripper past. David is quoted as saying, “I think America is smart enough by now to know that people’s personal lives should not influence their musical career.” People's personal lives ALWAYS affect their careers. *cough* Britney Spears *cough* David also says that the producers knew about his stripping all along (duh) and that he's “not ashamed of anything in my past.” Past? This was like 5 months ago. You were doing it up until you had to leave for Hollywood week on Idol. That's not your past, that's like yesterday. Oh well, his delusions about getting a record deal are even funnier, but hey, maybe America likes closeted gay stripper pizza bistro workers more than we think! Maybe this whole thing has just taught him to stop lying for no reason at least.