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As if we didn't already know about this... what took her so long to finally admit it? The New York Post reports that Paula Abdul finally comes clean in the latest issue of Ladies Home Journal. Ms. Rehabdul says she kicked a 12 year addiction to painkillers last Thanksgiving and is now clean. Paula also says that the pain patch that she often wore was "80 times more potent than morphine."

This news is about as shocking as Clay Aiken announcing he's gay. We knew you were a druggie, Paula. Everyone did. It was obvious. Why do we have the sneaking suspicion if you lied all these years about your drug use, you may not be clean now? Then again, Paula has been surprisingly lucid and intelligent this season on Idol, so she may be telling the truth.

Everyone's favorite hot mess, Paula Rehabdul, rehashes the same old story with ABC News, saying that she's never been on drugs. But this time it's actually funny when someone calls her out.

"I will not take those drugs," Abdul said. "And you can check my medical records. There is nothing like that. I was never on Oxycontin or Vicodin or anything like that. I was on nerve medicine and anti-inflammatories."

Last week ABC News followed up on Abdul's offer to "check her medical records," asking for her permission to speak to one of her doctors. She declined.

Oh Paula, you're so silly. Paula also says her short lived reality series "Hey, Paula" was the biggest mistake of her life because it made her look ridiculous. Yet, Paula was an executive producer on the show. Was she too messed up on the painkillers she doesn't take to make it to the editing meetings?

Paula announced on a KISS Phoenix radio interview that the top 6 theme this year is Disco. This is awesome news for 2 reasons. 1) Lil Rounds will have to pick an up-tempo song to entertain us all and 2) Adam Lambert will have to be flaming. Paula also said she is worried about Matt and Lil tonight. Paula will also choreograph next week's awful group number. Lil must still be around so we can see her glorious ass shake to the beat of disco.

MJ's Big Blog has an interview up with Paula where she states that the top 8 theme is Songs From the Year You Were Born. It's going to be basically 80's night minus 1 (Allison). So what suggestions do we have for Megan, born in 1985, if she somehow defies all odds and makes it through?

Like a Virgin, Madonna
Material Girl, Madonna
Dress You Up In My Love, Madonna
Take on Me, A-Ha
Sugar Walls, Sheena Easton
Obsession, Animotion
Private Dancer, Tina Turner
Walking on Sunshine, Katrina and the Waves
Solid, Ashford and Simpson
California Girls, David Lee Roth

Don't play it safe, Megan. You see what that gets you. You have to come out and have fun. If you're even around. Even though everyone thinks you're going home tonight, we're holding out hope.

The only people Idol could get to accept a fake award are a drunk and an 8-year old? They must not care about winning this. To be fair, I doubt anyone cares about the Kids' Choice Awards.

Starpulse.com tells a story about how no one cares about Paula Abdul. Apparently Paula was at a party in the late 90's that her former father-in-law Martin Sheen also was attending. When Paula ran into Martin and said hi, he brushed her off, and then asked her who the hell she was. To be fair to Martin, Paula meant absolutely nothing to anyone in the late 90's, so his mistake is understandable. If that scene were to take place today, we're sure Martin would recognize Paula as the national spokesperson for failures of AA.

Because American Idol wants to steal more money from kids, Fremantle has partnered with Upper Deck to put American Idol contestants on a new series of trading cards, available April 21. There are 138 cards in all. Cards will probably include a scratch and barf Constantine Maroulis, a much smaller than real life Jorbacca Sparks card (so the card wouldn't have to weigh 10,000 pounds), and a Jason Castro card that steals your money while you sleep. but we think the Paula abdul card (left) is a gross misrepresentation. Where's the slurring? Where's the vodka? Where's the ridiculous outfit? Worsters would obviously create a much better deck of cards, so post yours in the comments if you come up with anything better.

We've heard it all before and it's never as good as we hope. Could this finally be the tell-all book about American Idol we've been waiting for? The Evil Beet says a book is on its way and it basically just talks about what we already say on this site every day. But it would be nice to be validated some more:

• Paula is always with bottles full of pills when she's on the road for Idol auditions.
• Plants get to skip the audition process and got on the show due to deals with 19 Management or producers.
• The producers force contestants to sing certain songs or force them to change songs.

Seriously, all stuff we've been saying for years, but it'll be interesting to see if it goes into detail and has proof for us. Thanks to Juan for the tip.

The New York Post is reporting that Paula Rehabdul told OK Magazine that adding a 4th judge was a mistake. "It takes up so much time for each of us to give our opinion that it slows down the pace of the show," says Pauler. Who knew, Paula's right! What next, she ponders some changes to Newton's law of universal gravitation? Nah, she'll probably just pass out on Simon's lap and drool a bit.

Paula just doesn't get it. After the massive failure of "Dance Like There's No Tomorrow" (which was semi-decent), she is still attempting to make new music. This time, she just put together a bunch of annoying synthesizer noises and processes the hell out of her voice. This bitch couldn't even get past the auditions of Idol with this crap.