More Pain and Suffering
dave youre a dork, u guys are sending home people with real talent and potential just to get a cheap laugh, youre pathetic and you have no lives, u think youre idea is clever? its not, its nothing but dumb and irritating, and if u think u can change the true outcome youre probably wrong, u dont have that much power, youre just embarrassing yourself, look how many people are in this group compared to the millions of people who watch american idol, u cant do shit, all youre doing is wasting your time, not like u have anything better to do though fucking losers. oh btw stop giving yourself credit when u deserve none, taylor was gonna win anyway he had way more fans, your pathetic little tiny cult didnt do shit, you even thinking u affected anything just proves your stupidity, fuck u worthless piece of shit
-Speed of Pain
Katharine McPhee Tortures Puppies
After hearing that Seattle was one of the worst audition cities ever, tonight’s show had a lot to live up to. Oddly enough, even though a lot of mediocre or bad people are going to Hollywood, the show produced more actual good singing talent tonight than an average episode. We still got to see very little of Paula, and when we do, she barely speaks English. You know what? I’m almost getting sick of making jokes about her being drunk. It’s just not right. Who am I to say? I mean, I shouldn’t just be lobbing insults like that. So from now on… I think I’m going to focus on her addiction to pain killers. There we go. I’m gonna go with a Vicodin overdose as Paula's drug of choice. Not because I know, but because it gives me a lot of material to work with. Wikipedia cites some of the side effects of being a pill popper like Paula:
Can you believe it - highest ratings ever?
Suffering Through Two Hours of Crap, To Listen to Crap Singing
Welcome back class to the OFFICIAL Professor Chan's Grading The Idols #1.
First off I have to say man, is this new Vote For The Worst site format incredible. It's pretty, and pretty readable. So now I'm a "blogger" and my American Idol reviews are now "blogs" and not columns. Does that make me a shut-in, cave-dwelling nerd? I hope not.
If you were with us from last year, you will notice I'm not using my patented "A-B-C Grading system" for the terrible singing shows. I'm saving that for the Finals... but with a new super-secret twist. Now on with the show...
The Minneapolis auditions were just horrific. There were only 2 people who made it through that couldn’t qualify as future VFTW contenders… so far. It seems that the producers will run this show into the ground and kill every ounce of talent until it’s The William Hung show. Not that I’m complaining. But seriously, do you have friends who watch this show for the talent? And do they have IQ’s above 100? We have guest judge Jewel who, according to Ryan, is “one of the most popular artists of the decade.” Ryan also announced in his pre-show monologue that “Katharine McPhee is America’s sweetheart” after launching into the other Idol’s successes. I guess the producers aren’t hiding the fact that they lie through their teeth anymore. Next week, Paula will be deemed the "world's most sober celebrity."
Paula Abdul Has Never Had a Drink in Her Life
In case you haven't seen the infamous Paula Abdul drunken video, check this out. Paula's excuse was that she was answering the wrong question into the wrong camera because she was confused. Looks like she's answering the right questions to me, just after one too many spirits. If this is a sign of things to come, Idol 6 will be AWESOME.
Remember that hysterical 30 second clip of weirdos that American Idol used to promo this episode? Yeah, all that hilarity is not so funny stretched over two hours. American Idol, I'm begging you, STOP the two hour episodes. Please!
In fact Seattle was an even more dire repeat of Minnesota, including the locked door, a meaner Randy, long painful silences and Apollo Creed.
I've broken the show down into two easily digested categories this time.
BAD SINGERS GOING TO HOLLYWOOD