David Archuleta

Hilarious! David Archuleta's father, Jeff Archuleta, was arrested for soliciting a prostitute in a massage parlor. Jeff is cited as admitting to police that he was receiving sexual favors from a prostitute, but his attorney later took back that claim and said Jeff was treating a back problem. We all know Jeff is an unattractive man who probably can't get women. But can't he at least get a frau that he doesn't have to pay for due to the fact that he's Gaspy's dad? At least Gaspy won't run into the same problem unless the massage parlor is run by dudes. The Archuleta family never fails to entertain VFTW. What will they do next?


P.S. If anyone finds the mug shot, send it to us ASAP. We will love you forever.

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There is no way that Gaspy keeps taking pictures like these (and the earlier ones) without playing to VFTW. Could he honestly think these pictures are good? Either way, we love that he keeps having pictures taken by second and third rate photographers for us to enjoy.

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No idea why this is news... but when Gaspy and Big Head when to the Phillipines to perform, they were stopped by local officials to check for Swine Flu. The two called their lawyers and didn't want to be tested, but eventually submitted once they found out they could be arrested for refusing. No word on why these 2 were tested, yet the former Idol who looks most like a pig, Carly Smithson, has not yet been quarantined.

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I guess Miley needed to sing with someone girlier than her, so she picked David. The acting is atrocious, but David fits right in, so maybe he should do more stuff like this so the over 18 crowd never has to see him again.<--break-->

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Here is Gaspy's latest music video for "Touch My Hand", which may or may not be about his crush on a VFTW moderator he saw in the audience at Idol. Though if asked who the song is about he would probably respond, "Oh Golly Gee! *gasp* I am too young *gasp* to have feeling about touching hands *gasp* with another person. *gasp* That's only for when I'm married *gasp gasp gasp*" (Video link from MJ's Big Blog)

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The only people Idol could get to accept a fake award are a drunk and an 8-year old? They must not care about winning this. To be fair, I doubt anyone cares about the Kids' Choice Awards.

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David Archuleta was supposed to show up for an after-concert party in Idaho this week, but decided to not go, according to an article in the Standard Journal. Was he scared of a frauen stampede after reading David Cook's blog, or is he just a jerk off? Probably both. In the article, Jason Clark, a sophomore at Brigham Young University-Idaho, said he was extremely upset and felt "cheated" when Gaspy didn't show. The reason why Jason thinks Gaspy is someone worth paying $10 a ticket to meet is unclear, but Jason may be suffering from a psychological condition known as idiocy. Overall though, bad move alienating the few people who still like you that are under 40, Gaspy. But at least there will be more room for the cow-sized frauen at his upcoming concerts.

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No they're not little girls. A group of David Archuleta's fans got together and filmed themselves after one of his concerts, where they all attended a funeral by the looks of things. These people look to be 4-5 times as old as David (since David is clearly 12). Creeeepy. Warning to future Idols: This is the fanbase that will stalk you once you're done on this show. Be warned now and assume a false identity.

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