Idol Tour Makes People Sleepy, Nauseous, Angry
Posted by thefunnystone on July 10, 2008 - 10:33pm
Reviews are coming in for the American Idol 2008 tour and they're just as we expected. Here are our favorite quotes thus far that chronicle this massive failure:
- "That's what "Idol" has done to this world. For seven seasons now, the sex-and-violence-free "family" show of our time has been informing and compromising kids' tastes in music, TV and concerts by forcing them to embrace ye ancient music of yesteryear. Much of that music is great, but more of it is truly, vilely heinous." - Doug Elfman, Las Vegas Review Journal
- "[David Archuleta] seemed genuinely terrified by his surroundings and struggled to get his fragile voice heard above the din." - Aidin Vaziri, San Francisco Chronicle
- "The last to take the stage was Cook, who greeted fans with his now-famously subdued rock version of Lionel Richie's "Hello." He would give the same treatment to Michael Jackson's "Billie Jean." Both were bores.He also played his new single, "The Time of My Life," which probably isn't good enough to be played in a bar." - Jim Harrington, San Jose Mercury News
- "A preshow danceoff between concertgoers and a giant felt Pop Tart, a 30-minute audience Guitar Hero competition, and a constant loop of jumbotron ad spots for So You Think You Can Dance, Guitar Hero, and the debut album by already-been-dropped Blake Lewis sometimes made me feel like my mom and I were trapped inside a giant, insufferable infomercial. It was total product-placement hell, at times." - Lyndsey Parker, Yahoo! Music
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I think this was my favorite line of the San Jose review
"At his best, [David Cook] seemed to channel the worst of '90s alt-rock, as he came across like one of those generic frontmen that were signed (and then quickly dropped) during the major-label feeding frenzy that rose with Stone Temple Pilots and Matchbox Twenty."
Testify.
I think that quote from Lyndsey Parker should be fully quoted, because right now, it feels as though it is insinuating that Blake's album is the sole reason she felt like she was "trapped inside a giant, insufferable infomercial," when really, she's talking about the actual product placement in the concert and the loop of ads on the jumbotron (hence referring to the ad for Blake's album). The quote is as follows:
"A preshow danceoff between concertgoers and a giant felt Pop Tart, a 30-minute audience Guitar Hero competition, and a constant loop of jumbotron ad spots for So You Think You Can Dance, Guitar Hero, and the debut album by already-been-dropped Blake Lewis sometimes made me feel like my mom and I were trapped inside a giant, insufferable infomercial. It was total product-placement hell, at times." - Lyndsey Parker, Yahoo! Music
What’s ironic is that all of the factors that made Cook stand out on the show are the things that could hold him back in the music biz. Most notably, he came across like a one-trick pony, relying way too heavily on the novelty and shtick of turning pop/R&B songs into brooding rockers. At his best, he seemed to channel the worst of ‘90s alt-rock, as he came across like one of those generic frontmen that were signed (and then quickly dropped) during the major-label feeding frenzy that rose with Stone Temple Pilots and Matchbox Twenty.
What’s that mean for this 25-year-old Texan’s career? It’s hard to say. As with past Idols tours, this 2008 campaign offered very little of use to help us handicap the potential of these singers. The show isn’t about looking ahead _ it’s about taking one more glance back at last season and reliving fans’ favorite boob-tube memories.
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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I love it! The tards hate these things and swarm the news sites to complain :D Bless them.
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The Idol tard comments to the negative reviews are always the best. God forbid that anyone with functioning brain cells go to one of these shows and point out that it's just a glorified karaoke show performed by people with almost no chance of developing an actual musical personality of their own. No, it has to be the BEST CONCERT EVARRR!!! as performed by the BEST CONTESTANTS EVAR!!! or else the writer is just a jealous, bitter, failed singer.
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I agree with aggrieved. It is fun to read the comments of the last review.
Paraphrased, because I did not feel like going back to read the comments again.
"You are a bad journalist--you are not supposed to state your opinions"---I thought that was the purpose of a review, for the writer to state their opinion.
"Since you did not love Archie, that just shows what a horrible writer you are, and how wrong Yahoo is for hiring you"--God forbid that someone should not worship the ground that Archuletta walks on.
There was some praise for her though. "Thanks for not worshipping Archuletta, I am tired of all the hype about that little twerp."--Must have been a worster, or someone who could be a worster.
Those reviews validate this site to the 10 fold! What is hilarious and soon to be tragic for this group of wanna-bees is the bubble they are in right now. Each of them REALLY think they are "the goods" and the accolades will come forever. They all better get used to this expression... "I said Super size me you stupid fuck".
__________________________What do you call a dog with no legs? It don't matter, he isn't coming anyway!
On a positive note, I caught Jason Castro on YouTube during one of the performances and he was actually really good. He covered Gnarles(sp?) Barkley's "Crazy" and he did an excellent job with it, and I HATE that kind of music. Out of all of them, I think he may be the one that goes on to a successful career.
__________________________"Mutainted dog shit throwup face!"-Brittany 4/30/08 Mailbag
That poor girl is actually replying to some of those retards
Ty C - Wed Jul 9, 2008 6:23pm
I went to both L.A. and Vegas shows. Ramiele and Kristy were terrible at both. Staples (and any large arena) amplifies bad singing. Brooke was off-pitch in L.A., much better in Vegas. Hopefully, if you go, she'll be good. Mike Johns, Carly, and Chikeezie were terrific. Castro mumbles, but sang well. Same with Archie. Cook was just okay on the slow stuff but great on rock numbers. Syesha rocked both nights.
Now if she is dealing with people who like cunty and ADB she is nicer than Kellie Pickler pretended to be
__________________________Sanjaya forever!!! :D
Once season 8 starts the tards will dump season 7 wannabees like they did Blake/Clay.
Fantards have a short attention span.