/pause for surprise as Syesha picks a big song by a black artist...
I was about to say better. But Fantasia?
HAHAHAHAHA!

And if Aussie Douche ruins Aerosmith, there will be hell toupee!

-A trick is something a whore does for money.-
-G.O.B. Bluth

Aussie Douche? Who's that? There's no one in the competition who fits that description. Do you mean Aussie Do That To Me One More Time? Or is that just my name for him?

Oh, VFTW. If I didn't love you I'd hate you.

By the way, I love that Jason is doing "Over the Rainbow." Over the last few weeks, it's seemed like his attitude about the show has shifted from "Heh, this is kinda cool" to "Duuuuuude, I gotta bolt." I'm hoping that he'll do the song the Sam Harris way, complete with tuxedo jacket w/tails, jeans and Chuck Taylors.

Idol recaps and inane pop culture ramblings - http://thepopeye.blogspot.com

JEEZ! How fucking boring can this chick get?

Were I an AI contestant, I think my uplifting song would be Metallica's "One".

Archuleta's dad: "I'm a fat, fugly, balding Mormon trumpeter. How do I get a semi-hot wife? I know! I'll do mission work in the Third World!"

Oh, and for you whippersnappers out there who don't remember Sam Harris...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AZyjSuOrRBw

Idol recaps and inane pop culture ramblings - http://thepopeye.blogspot.com

I love knowing the songs beforehand.

I absotively LOVE the nicknames !!!!!!
AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!! bay--bee

Thats total bullshit, right ? Guy flunks his senior year so he can be a dick 2 years in a row.....Dazed and Confused

So, what're the odds that the dirty hippy tries to do the Israel Kamakawiwo'ole version of "Over the Rainbow"?

"Humanity- you never had it to begin with."
-Bukowski
http://www.youtube.com/cmxpictures

Over the rainbow LMAO! let me guess he will sit in the stool and hold his guitar maybe lol get this potbrain out of here! LMFAO

Darrster1

Great, O'Planty and the Vile Aussie Jock ruin two more songs I like...

And I agree, Skeletor has GOT to pick some different material. You've Got a Friend? You've Got a Skull Masquerading as Your Face maybe.

My psychic powers are a little late tonight, but here we go:

Syesha - To fully immerse herself in the song, Syesha unwisely decides to cut her hair short like a boy, inject some testosterone in order to make her breasts shrink and her shoulders grow extra wide, and wear a pair of those jacked up false redneck teeth to better resemble Fantasia Crackhead-arino. Alas, all of Syesha's limited talent was stored up in her fabulous rack, so her performance predictably sucks with more might than a Dyson vaccuum.

David Cook - In trying to approximate Raine Maida's nasally squeak, David Cook inadvertently shatters the eardrums of every member of the studio audience. Since they are now deaf, they say it is David's best performance yet.

Carly - Obviously cracking under the pressure and intense media scrutiny, Carly hits the stage tonight an incredible 150 pounds heavier! Midway through the song, she becomes hungry and eats the microphone, followed by a mighty fart that echoes throughout the Idol studio. The judges agree that the fart was "a little pitchy."

Brooke - In a somber performance of another wussy 70s folk song, Brooke White cries so much that she tragically drowns in a puddle of her own tears.

Michael Johns - Michael takes the stage in a weird, Steven Tyler-inspired unitard. Just as he is about to tackle the series of high notes a the end of the song, Simon hits him square in the forehead with a boomerang. In a daze, Johns spends the remaining 30 seconds of the performance impersonating a koala bear. The judges declare that he is now "the one to beat."

Jason Castro - Having dropped almost a full sheet of blotter acid before the performance, Jason comes out tripping so hard that he actually transports himself to the land of Oz. He is unfortunately sodomized by a gang of roving munchkins and then crushed by a house.

Kristy - Yeehaw! Kristy pulls out all the stops this week and attempts to bring a donkey show to a live television audience for the first time. However, she ends up getting kicked in the head by the donkey, which ironically increases her IQ score by approximately 40 points. She is now up to the level of "functionally retarded." Oh, and she sings the song like crap, as usual.

David Archuleta - Before David can even begin singing, Robbie Williams storms the stage and rips Archuleta's arm out of its socket for trying to upstage him on Robbie's signature ballad. Archuleta smiles goofily and thanks Robbie, telling him what an honor it is to be mutilated by some pop singer his dad chose for him to cover. David goes on to win American Idol.

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